[The scene opens with an aerial shot
of a studio set. There are two men sitting behind a desk. One is Yo
Kurasawa - the legendary commentator, notorious pervert, and current
Vice President of Talent Relations and Head Booker for Iron Japan.
Next to him is Eric O'Flaherty – a pale man in an Irish flat cap. A
video screen is behind them.]
KURASAWA: Welcome to the English
language highlight show for Iron Japan Pro Wrestling! We're coming to
you from Budokan Hall after the conclusion of Team Crown 2016 –
Night One, which was a night full of first round action. Joining me
for this English broadcast is Pro Wrestling's Rogue Manager and
founder of the Ultraviolence Union – Eric O'Flaherty.
O'FLAHERTY: And
it was my guys in The Union who headlined the first round
festivities.
KURASAWA: Riddick
came into this night in pursuit of a Double Crown after winning the
World Crown Tournament in May. Sixteen teams entered this tournament
with hopes of not only being the first ever Team Crown holders, but
they wanted a shot at the IJPW World Tag Team Championship at Violent
Conduct – a two-night spectacle of hardcore puroresu that will be
held here next month at Budokan.
O'FLAHERTY: And
who are the World Tag Team Champions, Yo?
KURASAWA: Your
guys – “The General” Ricky Holt and Teiji “The Terror”
Shintaro.
O'FLAHERTY: Damn
right.
KURASAWA: Now
let's get to the action that we saw earlier tonight.
Team Crown 2016
First Round Match
HATOYAMA and Astro
Honami vs. Lolly Lea and Lorie Koenig
KURASAWA: Lolly,
Lainey, and Lorie – The Deadly Three – spent a good effort
between May and now in trying to put Muffin Vanderburg away after her
Charm Explosion partner, Nicki Scherer, got her arm broken in the
World Crown Tournament. Even though Muffin was on her own, The Deadly
Three failed to put Muffin away and Charm Explosion entered the
tournament. But Lolly and Lorie couldn't worry about the possibility
of Charm Explosion getting even, because they had the fast-paced
junior heavyweight threats of Astro Honami and HATOYAMA in front of
them in the first round. Cassidy Reischer was the referee for this
match.
Team Crown 2016 First Round Match
DanHojo (Danjuro
Komatsuzaki and Ryuichi Hojo) vs. Tokyo Queens (Tae Maruguchi and
Kayoko Komon)
KURASAWA: Danjuro
Komatsuzaki put his rivalry with Markie Bristow on hold this month to
prepare for Team Crown 2016. The IJPW Dojo Master hoped his partner
and dojo assistant, Ryuichi Hojo, would pull it together after he's
been struggling since losing a quick but controversial feud to Muffin
Vanderburg. The unlikely duo of the Tokyo Queens wanted to be the
most recent ladies to bring shame to Hojo. Kayoko Komon even dared
Hojo to stuff her head into his tights on a piledriver, like he
infamously did to Muffin. The referee for this match was Kanzaburo
Outakara.
Team Crown 2016 First Round Match
Trans-Pacific
Poison (Ginger Mattingly and Nori Imoo) vs. Naraku no Soko (Vera
Vicious and Ashley Thorne)
KURASAWA: During
the three nights of International Incident last month, we saw Naraku
no Soko grow from two members, KANNON and Akuma Usami, into a
four-person unit. Bulgarian punk rocker Vera Yordanka was taken away
from Christy Hayden. She was Vera Vicious when we saw her on Night
Two. Ashley Thorne turned on her mentor and Original Deathmatch
Queen, Trista Capra, and formed a new team with Vera. Trans-Pacific
Poison wanted to use tonight's match to show that they weren't going
to make room for this new side in the tag team division. Tashiaki
Suzuki was the official for this match.
Team Crown 2016 First Round Match
Rotten Saints (Big
Ugly and J Murda) vs. Charm Explosion (Muffin Vanderburg and Nicki
Scherer)
KURASAWA: Big
Ugly thought he would miss out on Team Crown when his partner, Freddy
Deeds, got his neck broken during World Crown. He reached out to J
Murda, who comes from the same Detroit streets he's from, but there's
apparently a complicated history between Murda and the original
Rotten Saints outfit. Still, Murda liked the idea of taking a shot at
this tournament with someone he's familiar with back in the old
neighborhood. They took on Charm Explosion, who claimed that
Scherer's recovery from a broken arm and Vanderburg's wars with the
Deadly Three toughened them up for opponents like the Rotten Saints
and for the tournament as a whole. Masanori Katayanagi was the
official for this bout.
POST-MATCH
HIGHLIGHTS
[Charm
Explosion are already exiting back to the locker room. Murda and Ugly
are in the ring and appear to be discussing the ending. Ugly looks
defeated while Murda gets increasingly irate. Murda snaps and strikes
Ugly, which prompts the trading of blows. Dojo students get in the
ring to split the two Detroit street fighters.]
J
MURDA: Tapin' out to a
fuckin' bitch! You tapped out to a mutha fuckin' bitch! No wonder you
wanted me to be yo partner so badly when Freddy got done! You need
other niggas to carry yo ass! Fuck you! I ain't gonna be yo fuckin'
partner no more!
Team Crown 2016 First Round Match
Los Asesinos (Raul El Aguila and Roberto Lopez) vs. Naraku no Soko
(KANNON and Akuma Usami)
KURASAWA: KANNON
has assembled a dark force here in Iron Japan. The King of the Dark
World first brought Konosuke Usami into Naraku no Soko and turned him
into Akuma Usami. Naraku no Soko's second team in action tonight took
on Los Asesinos, whose Roberto Lopez is under fire for wearing Sawa's
legendary mask. Sawa threw the mask into a trash bin at another
promotion's show in March and Lopez took it for himself.
O'FLAHERTY: If
he's going to wear Sawa's mask, can he at least not look like such a
jobber? He's out there in gym shoes, sweat pants, and cheap-ass knee
pads. He has this famous mask on his head and yet everything else
makes him look like a giant goober.
KURASAWA: Nanako
Fujioka was the referee for this match.
Team Crown 2016 First Round Match
Noble Power (Nobuyoki Katsushika and Sakura Shizuka) vs. Dave Manton
and Stan Ward
KURASAWA:
Manton
and Ward won a mini-feud last month against Imperial during the week
of International Incident. They needed all of the momentum they could
get because they were drawn against Noble Power – IJPW World
Wrestling Champion Nobuyoki Katsushika and his girlfriend, Sakura
Shizuka. Noble Power came into this tournament as one of the
favorites, but Manton and Ward have always been in contention in
every tag team scene they've been in. Budokan Hall was heavily behind
Noble Power in this babyface natives vs. heel gaijins clash. Jimmy
Erikson was the referee for this contest.
Team Crown 2016 First Round Match
Doyle Brothers (Ronnie Doyle and Ricky Doyle) vs. Mallory and Mercy
(Mallory Northway and Mercy Monroe)
KURASAWA:
The
Doyle Brothers were the first ever IJPW World Tag Team Champions, but
they lost the straps at World Crown – Night Ten at the Tokyo Dome,
then failed to regain them in a rematch at the Tokyo Dome at
International Incident – Night Three. Ronnie Doyle is booked in a
triple threat match for the IJPW World Wrestling Championship at
Violent Conduct – Night Two next month, and this tournament gives
him an opportunity to earn another shot at the tag belts that same
weekend with his brother. Tonight, the Doyle Brothers took on Mallory
and Mercy – a team that broke down last month, as they tend to do
frequently, but solved their problems over a match at the Tokyo Dome.
Who won? The Belfast boys or the ladies from Arizona? Kuni Ariwara
was the referee for this bout.
*** MAIN EVENT ***
Team Crown 2016 First Round Match
Ultraviolence Union (Jun Hageshii and Riddick) vs. Ultraviolence
Union (Ricky Holt and Teiji Shintaro)
KURASAWA:
This
was a very interesting main event that caught everyone's attention
after the tournament draw last month.
O'FLAHERTY:
And
everyone in the Ultraviolence Union has been looking forward to it.
This it how we do it. The group was founded on the idea that we're
not afraid to fuck each other up.
KURASAWA:
Riddick
came into tonight with hopes of getting closer to a Double Crown.
He's been partnered with The Union's newest member, Jun Hageshii.
Holt and Shintaro are the IJPW World Tag Team Champions, and they
came in knowing they can choose their challengers at Violent Conduct
if they win the Team Crown Tournament. But the last time we saw Holt
and Shintaro, Eric, your guys left the Tokyo Dome with a successful
title defense despite Ronnie Doyle destroying Holt with a savage
assault.
O'FLAHERTY:
But
Ricky got by on heart and it's Ronnie's fault for getting cocky. Say
what you want, but Ricky and Teiji deserved to win that match and
they are the IJPW World Tag Team Champions for a reason. But tonight
was all about The Union and how we took over the main event. Nene
Hishikawa refereed this match. Now show the match, monkeys.
POST-MATCH HIGHLIGHTS
[Hageshii
favors his arm as Riddick steps through the ropes. Holt and Shintaro
high-five in the opposite corner and the referee raises both their
arms. Riddick catches Hageshii with a blow that sends him into the
corner. Riddick kicks him in the gut a few times. With Jun doubled
over, Riddick grabs the arm he was favoring and bends it around the
top rope. Hageshii screams out as Riddick pulls back.]
KURASAWA: [In
Japanese.] Riddick's
pursuit of a Double Crown has ended after Holt tapped out Hageshii,
and now Riddick has lost it! He's taking it out on Jun!
SAKURAI: [In
Japanese.] This is
ridiculous. I get that he's disappointed, but come on. Tag team
wrestling is a team game. You succeed and fail as a team.
[Riddick stomps
Jun onto the ground and makes it a point to kick at the arm. Holt and
Shintaro just stand and watch. Riddick calls for a microphone from
one of the dojo students. He stands over Jun, who curls up in the
corner and holds his arm some more.]
RIDDICK: After
everything I said about you, Jun... This was a hard-fought match, but
you're just going to fucking tap out on me like that?
HOLT: [Voice
picked up by a mic.] To
be fair, it was my
chicken wing arm lock. I'm good at those!
RIDDICK: You
cost me a run at a Double Crown because you fucking tapped out on me,
Jun. Honestly, I still think you have a lot to do in order to prove
your worth in the Ultraviolence Union. So we're gonna have a match...
Next month, back here at Budokan Hall. Violent Conduct. I don't give
a fuck if it's Night One or Two. I don't give a fuck if it's both
nights and they have to drag your fucking corpse out for Night Two.
If you're going to cost me a run at a Double Crown, then you're going
to have to fucking prove to me that you deserve to be in the
Ultraviolence Union.
BACK IN THE STUDIO...
KURASAWA: Any
thoughts on the main event or the fallout?
O'FLAHERTY:
Ricky and Teiji overcame two
very talented and highly motivated men tonight. There's no reason to
think that they can't go on to win the Team Crown and have another
set of belts to carry. As for the fallout, I think Riddick's being
hard on Jun, but hey... Jun will fight Riddick at Violent Conduct and
this will be a good test for our newest member. I welcome it. This is
the Ultraviolence Union. It's what we do.
KURASAWA: After
the main event, we conducted the quarter-final draw in the ring. Here
is tomorrow night's card:
Team Crown 2016 Quarter-Final Match
HATOYAMA and Astro Honami vs. Naraku no
Soko (Vera Vicious and Ashley Thorne)
Team Crown 2016 Quarter-Final Match
Tokyo Queens (Tae Maruguchi and Kayoko
Komon) vs. Naraku no Soko (KANNON and Akuma Usami)
Team Crown 2016
Quarter-Final Match
Ultraviolence Union (Ricky Holt and
Teiji Shintaro) vs. Charm Explosion (Muffin Vanderburg and Nicki
Scherer)
Team Crown 2016 Quarter-Final Match
Noble Power (Nobuyoki Katsushika and
Sakura Shizuka) vs. Doyle Brothers (Ronnie Doyle and Ricky Doyle)
Singles Grudge Match
J Murda vs. Big Ugly
Singles Grudge Match
AKIO Must Date FAB If He Loses!
AKIO vs. Fabulous Adrian Bagglio
Team Crown 2016 Semi-Final Match
??? vs. ???
Team Crown 2016 Semi-Final Match
??? vs. ???
IJPW Television Championship
Albert Dixon vs. (c) Lainey Boyle
Singles Grudge Match
John Scroggs vs. Killer Komukai
*** MAIN EVENT ***
Team Crown 2016 Final
??? vs. ???
O'FLAHERTY: So
we have Murda and Ugly on the card tomorrow? Couldn't we do Riddick
and Jun too?
KURASAWA:
Riddick challenged him for
Violent Conduct though...
O'FLAHERTY:
Well... Fuck it. Riddick
already got a plane ticket to Las Vegas.
KURASAWA: Any
thoughts or predictions on tomorrow's matches?
O'FLAHERTY: Both
Naraku no Soko teams will advance. Doyle Brothers will beat Noble
Power. Ricky and Teiji will beat Charm Explosion and they'll go on to
win the whole tournament. Murda/Ugly could go either way. AKIO will
beat Bagglio. Dixon's gonna be the new IJPW Television Champion.
Scroggs will hammer Komukai, who will wish he just swallowed his
pride after Scroggs chokeslammed the shit out of him and got a KO win
for his team at the Tokyo Dome last month.
KURASAWA: That
does it for us tonight. We'll be back here tomorrow night at Budokan
Hall for Team Crown 2016 – Night Two! For Eric O'Flaherty, I'm Yo
Kurasawa. Good night from Tokyo!
[FADE TO
BLACK.]